Change...

I have come to the realization that I hate change. Change sucks! Things in my life have always been changing and moving onwards. I hate it, but I know it must happen.

One of my best friends is going to be moving to the other side of the country in just a few weeks and I hate it. She just had a baby and I wanted to spend some time with her and her new little one, but within a matter of days, she will be gone. We will still keep up with each other through e-mail and such, but I hate saying goodbye. But such is life when you live in a military town. People come in and three years later, they leave and you almost never hear from them again.

But change is almost always positive if you look past the emotional side of it. My friend is moving to a new place where she will have new and different opportunities for her and her little girl, as well as her family. She will be able to break out of a rut that she has been in for years. I'm so happy that she will have all these new things happening to her, but I HATE to say goodbye.

I just recently came out of a relationship and leaving the relationship was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. But there again, it was for the best, for both her and myself. I was hurt and scarred beyond what I thought a person could be, but God has taken care of me and the healing has already begun. I realize that change only helps you to become a better person, and you become stronger for enduring the painful process, and learning what to do, and what not to do for the next time.

This may sound strange, but I even hate changing this web page. I realize the need to keep people up to date of happenings and thoughts in my life, but at the same time, I don't want to mess with what I have already done. Sometimes I'm afraid that the changes I make to my site will be a let down from what I had originally had here, and sometimes, I'm afraid that I make it too good and I'll have to do something even more spectacular on my next update.

I think I think about stupid things way too much.. :)
Even though I hate change, I know that it is necessary. The Dead Sea in the Middle East is dead because there is no changing of the water that comes into it. There is no outlet, so the water simply stagnates and nothing can survive in stagnant water. I have learned through a long painful process that we must grow and change ourselves, or we become stagnant and our lives will produce nothing of value. Sure, you can float in the Dead Sea, but that's it.

I encourage you to embrace changes in your life.
If I have to, so do you! :)

Thank you for your time.